"In order to be irreplaceable one must always be different." 

                    -Coco Chanel 

peace.

I love this.

College and accepting myself.

            College application/admission essay: 
          When I was in eighth grade, I was one of the few people to stand out. I didn’t follow the crowd; I was okay with being myself. Unfortunately, kids are brutal in middle school, casting you out for being different. Being in a small school doesn’t help either since there are very few students.

          I’ll admit that I didn’t have many friends when I was in middle school. I didn’t belong to any specific clique, as a result no one really hung out with me. My closest friend was my social studies teacher. I ate lunch in her room everyday, because I didn’t have anyone to sit with in the cafeteria. This was when I began to realize that it was better to be myself than someone else.


At this point of my life I didn’t fit in anywhere, and it did get to me at times. One of the best things my sister said to me was, “You need to go to high school.” This made me realize that eighth grade wasn’t forever, and things would get better. I later found out that she was right.


         I made it through eighth grade, eating lunch in room 214 everyday, venting to my mom and most importantly continuing to be myself. In retrospect, my last year of middle school ended up being a great experience; it gave me the courage to embrace being different.


Today, I’m okay with the fact that at age thirteen, I didn’t have many friends. I’d rather have a few true friends than a bunch of fake ones. My middle school experience has helped me understand that I don’t have to care what other people think of me. I finally like how I am and encourage others to be themselves. 

- I wrote this as an essay on my college application to Eugene Lang The New School for Liberal Arts. The essay question was to write about a time when you were in the minority. I really couldn't think of anything until I ended up writing this (above). 

And honestly, it's true. Being a senior about to graduate high school this year, things really have changed for the better. I do accept myself the way I am. 

I got accepted to Eugene Lang. I went to visit on accepted students day 4 days ago. (My mom and I had to walk in the rain and the wind. It's actually really funny, because we got so wet, even with jackets, boots, and umbrellas.) I do like the school, but I don't love. I'm not gonna go to college at Eugene Lang, but I proved to myself that I was capable of getting in, and I will probably be accepted elsewhere. On the plus side, I got a free tote bag out of visiting!

ZIne. Photoshop. Felicia Day. Geek & Sundry.

Lately I have a new found love and obsession: Felicia Day. And it's not creepy, I just really like Felicia Day and her works and accomplishments. I am very inspired by what she has done. 

And I love Geek & Sundry. I spend a marginally large amount of time on Youtube, since I started watching everything Geek & Sundry. 

I never thought that I would watch TableTop. I mean come on a show where you watch people play boardgames. But, I was hooked the first time I watched it. Come on, Wil Wheaton hosts, that adds to the awesomeness. 

TableTop even led me to buy boardgames, like Dixit and Ticket to Ride. Why is a boardgame with trains so much fun? I don't know, it just is. 

And everyone should watch The Flog (even though it's not going to be continued in Geek & Sundry season 2), because it's epic and random, and everything Felicia does looks like so much fun!!

So below is my attempt at making a cover for a zine I was trying to create. I was (or will be) about Felicia Day, Joss Whedon, and feminism. Three of my favorite things (people?).   

Original photo (screenshot). 

After my first attempt at photoshop.

Horrible attempt at making a zine cover. 

A Room Of One's Own - Virginia Woolf - The Hours

Last year in my A.P. Language (English) class we read Virginia Woolf's A Room Of One's Own (AROOO) and then watched the movie The Hours based on the Michael Cunningham novel of the same name. 

We were then asked to write an essay about both AROOO and The Hours. This is my essay:

A Room Of One's Own & The Hours

            The courage of a woman is no different than the courage of man. The act of writing a book and not knowing how you will or won’t be criticized must be challenging. Virginia Woolf and Michael Cunningham both faced the criticism and speculation in order to share their ideas and thoughts with others. Both proving something with their writing, even if not seeking to. It’s impressive to discover that The Hours, the book, turned movie was written by a man. Who would have thought that a man would be able to tap into the thoughts of women and be able to capture these female characters so well? Interestingly enough Cunningham’s writing of this book and the book itself, tie into a number of theories and ideas that are presented in Woolf’s A Room Of One’s Own.

            Cunningham’s ability to create a book about women from their perspectives is linked to the concepts that are found within the pages of AROOO. As a male author, Cunningham proves that a man is capable of using the feminine side of his mind and uses it accordingly, to write fiction. This relates to Coleridge’s theory of the androgynous mind, which Woolf discusses in her book. Woolf “…went on amateurishly to sketch a plan of the soul so that in each of us two powers preside, one male, one female; and in the man’s brain, the man predominates over the woman…” and vice versa.  This theory is also visible in the movie The Hours as well. This concept can be seen I the fact that Richard’s novel was of the female perspective. The comparisons that are made between Virginia Woolf and Richard also reveal so. Virginia’s suicide along with Richard’s suicide show how two people of the opposite sex felt the same way, and they knew that they were doing what they thought best for the one they loved most. The two of them wrote or said the same thing to Leonard and Clarissa respectively; “I don’t think two people could have been happier than we have been.”

            If one steps off of the path to wander the grasses, are they directed to return to the path? In Woolf time women would be yet men would not. Men possessed a sense of freedom that women did not, and furthermore, they expressed superiority over women. The Hours proves that women are no longer under the control of men, and it reveals that balanced relationships did and do exist. Virginia Woolf was by no means controlled by her husband Leonard. Laura Brown may have been a traditional 50’s housewife, but her husband didn’t say what she could and couldn’t do, though society might have. Also the relationship between Clarissa and Richard was a very equal one, yet Clarissa tried to protect Richard. The movie proves that women are not controlled by men, that at least not all men try to control women.

            In AROOO, Woolf analyzes the development of female characters over time while, discussing the evolution of the novel. It’s interesting to think of this after watching The Hours, because you can use Woolf’s character of Mrs. Dalloway, as an example of a developed and complicated female character. In discussing the growth of women in fiction, Woolf ponders Lesbianism, as she reads Life’s Adventure by Mary Carmichael. In her novel, Carmichael reveals a lesbian relationship between two women; “Chloe liked Olivia.” The Hours too portrays this lesbianism, as the character of Clarissa is in a long-term relationship with her girlfriend Sally. There are also three kisses that are exchanged in the movie between women, further enhancing the idea of lesbianism, even though the kisses aren’t to be thought of as sexual. At two instances in the movie the kisses are more of a goodbye between friends, or sisters in the matter of Virginia and Vanessa. The other kiss is between Laura and Kitty, as they are unsure of Kitty’s health. The third kiss is shared between Clarissa and Sally towards the end of the movie after Richard’s suicide as a sort of reconciliation. According to Woolf, Carmichael as her contemporary was blazing a path for the further evolution of female literary characters. “It is all half lights and profound shadows like those serpentine caves where one goes with a candle peering up and down, not knowing where one is stepping.”

            The Hours proves that Virginia Woolf, and her ideas are here to stay. She has made an impression on not only those who read her works, but on those who watch The Hours, through Nicole Kidman’s portrayal of her. A Room Of One’s Own will continue to be one of those classics that everyone knows by name, while The Hours will remain that movie with Meryl Streep, about Virginia Woolf. No matter what they both have many more hours left to face.   

Astonishing X-Men

I love this comic book cover that I found while looking at magazines in Barnes & Noble!

Superheroes have issues too!